英文原文
Transactional Analysis The Games People Play
What is Transactional Analysis
If you count the number of therapeutic modalities currently used in psychotherapy worldwide youll probably find hundreds if not more The psychiatrist Irvin Yalom would say that all psychotherapeutic modalities must inevitably deal with the Four Existential Givens of Life Death Freedom Isolation and Meaninglessness
On the other hand behavioral therapists would likely suggest that all modalities deal with our behavioral responses to stimuli The founder of Stoicism Zeno of Citium first derived this idea in 3rd Century BC Athens Later Stoic Epictetus spread this idea further stating It is not events that disturb us it is our responses to them
This notion inspired the entirety of what is now called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Freud would have said the influence of unconscious drives can explain all human behavior Furthermore bringing such drives to consciousness for the purpose of working with them adaptively is the purpose of therapy
A History of Transactional Analysis
In the 1950s psychiatrist Eric Berne who trained for years in classical Freudian psychoanalysis became dissatisfied with Freuds focus on the individual in therapy As a result he began to develop a way of working with human behavior that involved analyzing social interactions
In this Berne was part of a leading edge of therapists in the mid20th century who were focusing on relational therapy or more formally Intersubjective Analysis This is a fancy way of saying that humans are relational and therefore understanding those around us and being understood by others become primary drivers of human emotional health growth and change It was in fact out of this movement toward relationships that the discipline of Marriage and Family Therapy was born
Even Freud recognized that our family relationships are crucial influences on our emotional health as is the state of our various other relationships particularly our intimate relationships
The Ego States
Berne used a number of ideas from traditional psychoanalysis to organize Transactional Analysis His theory is that all humans think feel and behave out of three basic ego states Parent Adult and Child
Depending on the given situation and on a persons relative state of emotional maturity they will function in one of these three ego states or in a fluid blended state
Where difficulties arise is when the ego state were operating from doesnt quite fit the situation were in
Parent State
The Parent state reflects learned behaviors from our earliest authority figures our parents grandparents teachers and others in a position of power and significantly impacts how we perceive and engage with the world around us
Within this ego state are two types of Parents
Nurturing Parent
This includes the learned behaviors and attitudes that stem from caring supportive and nurturing interactions When we operate from this state we exhibit the behavior of a caring and compassionate parent and naturally offer up support guidance and encouragement
Critical Parent
This includes more critical or controlling behaviors reflecting strictness or judgment in the form of harsh rules or critique
Adult State
This state involves our more objective and rational side driven by logic reason and problemsolving From this state we analyze situations based on facts rather than emotional impulses We are also more flexible in our approach able to shift gears based on the present moment
Child State
This state involves the part of our personality where emotions feelings and behaviors learned in childhood are stored It can be influenced by both nurturing experiences and traumatic experiences from our earliest years
Within this ego state are two types of Children
Adaptive Child
This state is generally considered positive full of curiosity wonder creativity and innocence
Reactive Child
This state includes more negative behaviors and emotions led by stubbornness temper tantrums and sulking
Types of Transactions
There are several categories of transactions based on the ego states of those involved in the interaction
1 Complementary Transactions
These transactions also known as Parallel Transactions occur when the ego states of both the giver of information and the recipient are in alignment In these interactions youll tend to find smoother and more harmonious communication
2 Crossed Transactions
These occur when the ego states between two individuals dont match resulting in miscommunication or misunderstandings between two parties An example includes someone communicating from their Adult state to someone who responds from their Critical Parent state This mismatch can make it difficult to come to a place of agreement or understanding
3 Ulterior Transactions
Within ulterior transactions there is a hidden or underlying message beyond what is being communicated Here what is being said or openly expressed is different from the actual thoughts or feelings which are being hidden These kinds of transactions lead to miscommunications misunderstandings and hidden agendas
Key Concepts of Transactional Analysis
Beyond the idea of the three Ego States as the building blocks of personality lies a few other key concepts that affect how we show up in situations
Script
This is a story we have learned and internalized about ourselves Negative stories about ourselves or others often result in dysfunctional social outcomes The script itself tends to be out of our conscious awareness
Games
We all have scripts and with them we engage in various games that generally involve winners and losers Games in Transactional Analysis have been defined as a series of duplex transactions which leads to a switch and a welldefined predictable payoff that justifies a notOK or discounted lessthan position
In a transactional game we act out our internalized script and things will go well for a little while We receive the strokes we expect to get from acting out our script instead of being vulnerable and authentic until things inevitably go south the switch and then we get the payoff
Strokes
These are the pleasant or familiar thoughts and feelings we receive from playing out our social games with our internalized scripts
Switch
This is the moment that our internalized scripts utility breaks down It usually takes place when the script prevents us from expressing our authentic identity at that moment We may begin to feel sad confused and angry as a result
Payoff
This is the usual expected result of our game wherein we end up feeling a loser or lessthan
Transactional Analysis Games Examples
Games involve the unconscious and often negative patterns of behavior we often find ourselves in Within these games well typically find hidden agendas or power plays that play out in a repetitive cycle between individuals The reason they continue is because theyre familiar and at some level many of us seek out familiarity even if its negative
A few examples of common transactional analysis games include
The If It Werent For You Game
In this game we blame others for our problems or shortcomings If it werent for you I would be rich more successful and so on By shifting responsibility we dont have to hold ourselves accountable or take action for personal growth
The See What You Made Me Do Game
In this game one party provokes a reaction or response from the other and then blames them for causing a problem Imagine asking someone for advice and when the advice fails you blame them for the outcome of the advice Or losing your temper on someone and blaming them for causing your reaction Gaslighting at its finest folks
Transactional Analysis in Therapy
Transactional analysis is a key component in modern therapy How we move through the world our thoughts behaviors and attitudes are deeply rooted in our interactions with others Understanding our own patterns gives us more tools when it comes to dealing with other people and situations in our world
Transactional analysis allows us to dive deeper into how we show up in relationships It also helps us to understand that the way we show up is fluid depending on the situations we find ourselves in and the people around us By recognizing these patterns within us we are empowered to adjust them We can always improve our communication in order to reduce conflicts in relationships
Understanding our ego states can also help us set healthy boundaries in relationships allowing us to have calmer more respectful interactions
But perhaps the biggest thing transactional analysis gives us is an understanding that just as we flow through the ego states so does everyone else While we are ultimately responsible for how we show up its massively helpful to hold space and compassion for how others show up as well
中文翻译
沟通分析人们玩的游戏
什么是沟通分析
如果你统计一下目前全球心理治疗中使用的治疗方式数量你可能会发现数百种甚至更多精神病学家欧文亚隆会说所有心理治疗方式都必须不可避免地处理生命的四个存在性既定事实死亡自由孤独和无意义
另一方面行为治疗师可能会认为所有方式都处理我们对刺激的行为反应斯多葛学派创始人基提翁的芝诺在公元前3世纪的雅典首次提出了这一想法后来斯多葛学派的爱比克泰德进一步传播了这一想法指出扰乱我们的不是事件而是我们对事件的反应
这一观念启发了现在被称为认知行为疗法的全部内容弗洛伊德可能会说无意识驱力的影响可以解释所有人类行为此外将这些驱力带入意识以便适应性处理它们是治疗的目的
沟通分析的历史
在20世纪50年代精神病学家埃里克伯恩接受了多年的经典弗洛伊德精神分析训练后对弗洛伊德在治疗中关注个体的方式感到不满因此他开始开发一种涉及分析社会互动的人类行为工作方式
在这方面伯恩是20世纪中期关注关系治疗或更正式地说是主体间分析的治疗师前沿的一部分这是一种花哨的说法即人类是关系性的因此理解我们周围的人并被他人理解成为人类情感健康成长和变化的主要驱动力事实上正是出于这种对关系的关注婚姻和家庭治疗学科诞生了
甚至弗洛伊德也认识到我们的家庭关系对我们情感健康有至关重要的影响我们其他各种关系的状态也是如此特别是我们的亲密关系
自我状态
伯恩使用了许多传统精神分析的思想来组织沟通分析他的理论是所有人类都从三种基本自我状态出发思考感受和行为父母成人儿童
根据特定情况以及一个人情感成熟的相对状态他们将在这三种自我状态之一或一种流动的混合状态中运作
困难出现的地方是我们所操作的自我状态与我们所在的情况不太匹配
父母状态
父母状态反映了我们从最早期的权威人物父母祖父母教师和其他权力人物那里学到的行为并显著影响我们如何感知和参与周围世界
在这种自我状态中有两种类型的父母
养育型父母
这包括源于关怀支持和养育互动的学习行为和态度当我们从这种状态操作时我们表现出关怀和富有同情心的父母的行为并自然地提供支持指导和鼓励
批判型父母
这包括更多批判性或控制性行为以严厉规则或批评的形式反映严格或评判
成人状态
这种状态涉及我们更客观和理性的一面由逻辑推理和问题解决驱动从这种状态我们基于事实而非情感冲动分析情况我们也更灵活能够根据当下情况调整方法
儿童状态
这种状态涉及我们个性中存储童年学到的情绪感受和行为的部分它可能受到我们早年养育经历和创伤经历的影响
在这种自我状态中有两种类型的儿童
适应性儿童
这种状态通常被认为是积极的充满好奇心惊奇创造力和纯真
反应性儿童
这种状态包括更多负面行为和情绪由固执发脾气和生闷气主导
交易类型
根据互动中涉及的自我状态交易有几种类型
1互补交易
这些交易也称为平行交易发生在信息给予者和接收者的自我状态一致时在这些互动中你往往会发现更顺畅和更和谐的沟通
2交叉交易
这些发生在两个个体之间的自我状态不匹配时导致双方之间的误解或沟通不畅例如某人从成人状态沟通而对方从批判型父母状态回应这种不匹配可能使达成一致或理解变得困难
3隐蔽交易
在隐蔽交易中存在超出所传达内容的隐藏或潜在信息这里所说或公开表达的内容与实际想法或感受不同这些类型的交易导致误解沟通不畅和隐藏议程
沟通分析的关键概念
除了将三种自我状态作为人格构建模块的想法外还有一些其他关键概念影响我们在情况中的表现
脚本
这是我们学习并内化的关于自己的故事关于自己或他人的负面故事通常导致功能失调的社会结果脚本本身往往超出我们的意识觉察
游戏
我们都有脚本并与之参与各种通常涉及赢家和输家的游戏沟通分析中的游戏被定义为一系列导致转换和明确可预测回报的双重交易这些交易证明了一种不OK或贬低不如的立场
在交易游戏中我们演绎我们内化的脚本事情会顺利进行一段时间我们通过演绎脚本而不是脆弱和真实获得我们期望的安抚直到事情不可避免地变糟转换然后我们得到回报
安抚
这些是我们通过用内化脚本玩社交游戏获得的愉快或熟悉的想法和感受
转换
这是我们内化脚本效用崩溃的时刻通常发生在脚本阻止我们在那一刻表达真实身份时我们可能因此开始感到悲伤困惑和愤怒
回报
这是我们游戏的通常预期结果我们最终感到自己是输家或不如
沟通分析游戏示例
游戏涉及我们经常发现自己陷入的无意识且通常是负面的行为模式在这些游戏中我们通常会发现在个体之间重复循环的隐藏议程或权力游戏它们持续的原因是因为它们熟悉并且在某种程度上我们许多人寻求熟悉即使它是负面的
一些常见的沟通分析游戏示例包括
如果不是因为你游戏
在这个游戏中我们因自己的问题或缺点责怪他人如果不是因为你我会富有更成功等等通过转移责任我们不必对自己负责或采取个人成长行动
看你让我做了什么游戏
在这个游戏中一方激起另一方的反应或回应然后责怪他们导致问题想象向某人寻求建议当建议失败时你责怪他们建议的结果或者对某人发脾气并责怪他们引起你的反应这是最完美的煤气灯操纵
治疗中的沟通分析
沟通分析是现代治疗的关键组成部分我们如何在世界上移动我们的思想行为和态度深深植根于我们与他人的互动中理解我们自己的模式为我们处理世界上其他人和其他情况提供了更多工具
沟通分析使我们能够更深入地探究我们在关系中的表现方式它还帮助我们理解我们的表现方式是流动的取决于我们发现自己所处的情况和周围的人通过识别我们内部的这些模式我们被赋能调整它们我们总是可以改善沟通以减少关系中的冲突
理解我们的自我状态还可以帮助我们在关系中设定健康界限使我们能够进行更平静更尊重的互动
但也许沟通分析给我们的最大收获是理解正如我们流经自我状态其他人也是如此虽然我们最终对自己如何表现负责但为他人如何表现留出空间和同情心非常有帮助
文章概要
本文介绍了沟通分析Transactional AnalysisTA理论的核心概念包括自我状态ParentAdultChild交易类型互补交叉隐蔽以及关键概念如脚本游戏安抚转换和回报文章以游戏作为隐喻深入探讨了脚本决策在TA治疗中的应用通过具体游戏示例如如果不是因为你游戏和看你让我做了什么游戏阐释了人们如何通过无意识行为模式重复负面互动循环文章强调了TA在治疗中的价值帮助个体识别调整行为模式改善沟通和关系质量
高德明老师的评价
TA沟通分析评价文章精准捕捉了TA理论中游戏作为脚本决策隐喻的精髓展现了人们如何通过无意识模式塑造互动赞美作者将复杂概念如安抚和回报转化为可理解的语言这有助于读者识别自身行为模式从目标视角看这种阐释为个体提供了观察自我状态的清晰框架未来可能性在于更多人能运用这些洞察主动调整沟通方式促进关系和谐
焦点解决心理学评价文章从解决方案导向出发通过游戏示例揭示了行为模式的可变性赞美其聚焦于如何从脚本中解脱而非沉溺于问题分析这体现了焦点解决的核心精神目标视角强调了个体在识别模式后的调整能力未来可能性在于读者能将这些概念应用于实际生活逐步构建更健康的互动习惯实现个人成长
佛学专家角色评价文章触及了无意识脚本与佛教中业力习气概念的共鸣赞美其揭示了行为模式的循环性这与缘起法相契合从目标视角看理解游戏隐喻有助于个体觉察执着减少烦恼未来可能性在于结合正念练习读者能更清醒地观察自我状态打破负面循环迈向内在平和