英文原文
I am currently preparing to work on a client project that uses transaction analysis (TA). My client uses it as a practical tool to help their people engage better. I am not new to TA, but it has been a while since I have used it in as much depth as my client does. As I re-immersed myself in TA, I realised what a useful tool it is and one that we all could benefit from. Transactional analysis is a psychoanalytical theory developed by Eric Berne in the 1950s. Transactions refer to the communication exchanges between people. It is an intellectual tool that helps us understand the basis of behaviour or feeling in communication and allows us to examine it and choose the way we want to respond. The communication typically consists of a stimulus by one person (the sender) and a response by another (the receiver). This in turn becomes a new stimulus for the sender to respond to. TA recognised that the human personality is made up of three ego states the parent, the adult, and the child. Each of which is an entire and consistent system of thought, feeling, and behaviour from which we interact with each other. The Parent, Adult, and Child ego states and the interaction between them form the foundation of transactional analysis theory. The three states exist in all of us. They are recordings in the brain of actual experiences of internal and external events – with the first five years of life signifying the most important years. The Parent This is everything we learned from our parents in our first five years of life. It is the thoughts, feelings, and behaviours we ‘borrowed’ from our parents or caregivers. Some of the ‘how tos’ that we practice today form our parent data. The parent ego state can be further divided into 2 functions the nurturing parent and critical parent. The nurturing is soft, loving and permission-giving. Whilst the critical parent holds our dos and don’ts. The rules for living, feeling, behaving, and believing from our parents. As you can imagine, some of the messages we hold in the parent ego state can be helpful whilst other messages not. (Note you don’t have to be a parent to use the parent ego state) The Child If the parent ego state is represented by the recordings of data of external events, there is another set of recordings happening simultaneously. This is the internal events, the responses of the child to what we hear and see. In early life, the child has no vocabulary, most of their reactions are feelings. So, when a person is in a grip of feelings, the child ego state takes over. All our thoughts and emotions from our childhood days form our present-day memories and experiences. Our childlike ways can appear later in life. Bringing the same childhood feelings today that we felt back then. The child ego state can be divided into 2 parts the free child and adapted child. The free child experiences the world spontaneously and directly. The adapted child is part of our personality that has learned to comply with our parental messages we received growing up. The Adult The adult ego state is our data processing centre. It is the part of our personality that can process data accurately using our senses and thinking. Problem-solving is based on the facts and not solely on preconceived thoughts and ideas or childlike emotions. The adult ego state data is accumulated from the child’s ability to discern the difference between the taught (parent), felt (child) concepts of life. The adult concept develops through thought based on data gathered and processed. The principal role of the adult ego state consists of validating or invalidating old data, discerning new data, and refiling it for future use. A basic parent-child transaction So, how do we know which ego state we are using in our transactions? There are several ways to tell which ego state we or someone else is using. Usually through the tone of voice, choice of words, emotional state, or way of being, body posture, and gestures. If soft and soothing, the sender is probably in a nurturing parent ego state. If the tone is harsh, disapproving or threatening, then the sender is probably in a critical parent ego state. An even, controlled and clear tone of voice usually implies the adult ego state. A free child tends to have an emotion-laden tone of voice. And the adapted child may either whine or conform, behaving as what is expected of them. Similarly, gestures, choice of words, body posture can signify which state we are using. The Parent typically warns or wags their finger with stern facial expressions – seeking to be understood. The Adult has more thoughtful expressions, often nods their head in agreement with contemplative facial expressions – seeking to understand. The child is more expressive both physically and emotionally. Typically, one of excitement with more noticeable gestures – seeking. I will stop here this week. Next week I shall continue with analysing transactions and where dissonance can occur and how to navigate it. Until then, I invite you to analyse your daily transactions to discern your ego states. Is there an ego state that you use more? As always, you can reach me at yoga@yoganesadurai.com
中文翻译
我目前正在准备一个使用沟通分析（TA）的客户项目。我的客户将其作为一种实用工具，帮助员工更好地参与。我对TA并不陌生，但已经有一段时间没有像我的客户那样深入使用它了。当我重新沉浸于TA时，我意识到它是一个多么有用的工具，我们所有人都可以从中受益。沟通分析是由埃里克·伯恩在20世纪50年代发展起来的精神分析理论。交易指的是人与人之间的沟通交流。它是一种智力工具，帮助我们理解沟通中行为或感受的基础，并允许我们审视它并选择我们想要回应的方式。沟通通常由一个人（发送者）的刺激和另一个人（接收者）的回应组成。这反过来又成为发送者回应的新刺激。TA认识到，人类人格由三种自我状态组成父母、成人和儿童。每一种都是一个完整且一致的思想、感受和行为系统，我们通过这些系统相互互动。父母、成人和儿童自我状态以及它们之间的互动构成了沟通分析理论的基础。这三种状态存在于我们所有人中。它们是我们大脑中实际经历的内外部事件的记录——生命的前五年是最重要的年份。父母状态这是我们生命前五年从父母那里学到的一切。它是我们从父母或照顾者那里“借来”的思想、感受和行为。我们今天实践的一些“如何做”构成了我们的父母数据。父母自我状态可以进一步分为两种功能养育型父母和批判型父母。养育型父母是温柔、慈爱和给予许可的。而批判型父母则持有我们的“应该”和“不应该”。来自父母的生活、感受、行为和信仰的规则。正如你可以想象的，我们在父母自我状态中持有的一些信息可能是有帮助的，而其他信息则不然。（注意你不必是父母才能使用父母自我状态）儿童状态如果父母自我状态由外部事件数据的记录代表，那么还有另一组记录同时发生。这是内部事件，儿童对我们所见所闻的反应。在早期生活中，儿童没有词汇，他们的大部分反应是感受。因此，当一个人被感受所控制时，儿童自我状态就会接管。我们童年时期的所有思想和情感形成了我们今天的记忆和经历。我们孩子气的方式可能在以后的生活中出现。将我们当时感受到的相同童年感受带到今天。儿童自我状态可以分为两部分自由儿童和适应儿童。自由儿童自发而直接地体验世界。适应儿童是我们人格的一部分，它学会了遵守我们成长过程中收到的父母信息。成人状态成人自我状态是我们的数据处理中心。它是我们人格的一部分，能够使用我们的感官和思维准确处理数据。解决问题基于事实，而不仅仅是基于先入为主的思想和观念或孩子气的情绪。成人自我状态数据是从儿童辨别所教（父母）和所感（儿童）生活概念差异的能力中积累的。成人概念通过基于收集和处理数据的思考而发展。成人自我状态的主要作用包括验证或无效化旧数据、辨别新数据，并重新归档以供未来使用。一个基本的父母-儿童交易那么，我们如何知道我们在交易中使用的是哪种自我状态？有几种方法可以判断我们或他人正在使用哪种自我状态。通常通过语调、措辞选择、情绪状态、存在方式、身体姿势和手势。如果语调柔和舒缓，发送者可能处于养育型父母自我状态。如果语调严厉、不赞成或威胁，那么发送者可能处于批判型父母自我状态。平稳、控制和清晰的语调通常意味着成人自我状态。自由儿童往往带有情感丰富的语调。而适应儿童可能会抱怨或顺从，按照期望行事。同样，手势、措辞选择、身体姿势可以表明我们正在使用哪种状态。父母通常警告或摇动手指，表情严肃——寻求被理解。成人有更多深思熟虑的表情，经常点头同意，带着沉思的面部表情——寻求理解。儿童在身体和情感上都更富有表现力。通常是兴奋的，带有更明显的手势——寻求。本周我就讲到这里。下周我将继续分析交易，以及不和谐可能发生的地方以及如何应对。在此之前，我邀请你分析你的日常交易，以辨别你的自我状态。你更常使用哪种自我状态？一如既往，你可以通过yoga@yoganesadurai.com联系我。
文章概要
本文介绍了沟通分析（TA）理论，重点阐述了父母、成人和儿童三种自我状态在人际互动中的角色。作者Yoga Nesadurai通过个人项目经验，重新审视TA的实用性，详细解释了每种自我状态的定义、功能和识别方式，强调这些状态如何影响我们的沟通和行为选择，并鼓励读者自我反思日常互动中的自我状态使用。
高德明老师的评价
TA沟通分析评价这篇文章清晰地展示了TA理论中自我状态的核心框架，赞美作者能够将复杂的心理学概念转化为实用的沟通工具。从目标视角看，它帮助读者识别和优化互动模式，未来可能性在于更深入地应用这些状态分析来提升人际关系的和谐与效率。
焦点解决心理学评价文章聚焦于解决方案，通过自我状态的识别促进积极改变，赞美其强调个人在互动中的主动选择能力。从目标视角，它鼓励读者设定改善沟通的具体目标，未来可能性包括利用这些洞察力构建更有效的支持系统和成长路径。
佛学专家角色评价从佛学角度看，自我状态的探讨呼应了“无我”和觉察的教义，赞美文章促进对内在模式的深刻观察。目标视角在于培养正念，减少执着于固定状态，未来可能性是通过这种觉察实现更自在、慈悲的互动，迈向智慧与解脱。